After I re-read the chapter again and your comment, I too found Darken's actions with Nila more infuriating than amusing. Actually, it reminded me of the way you would treat a pet - pat the puppy on the head and toss him a treat to make him wag his tail. Very insulting and dismissive.

Darken knows what Kahlan is capable of when she has control over her powers - he saw her go into the Con Dar. Why on earth would he not respect his daughter's abilities? Very troubling.